Step on it, Velma, step on it!

A very successful final Screen on the Green for 2010. I miss it already!

This lady photobombed my picture of the sunset through the trees by smiling and looking cute.


Bonnie and Clyde sure do get real dead at the end of that film. Real real dead.

Silver Jenny Dollar

I went to Annapolis today! It was kind of like this:


Maybe tomorrow I will upload the thrilling video I took of some boats and stuff.

On saving money, and the word "also"

I gained cred today in two major areas!

First I got in a bike accident, which really doesn't count, because traffic was pretty much stopped, and I only just clipped the door of the Comcast truck with my brake lever, but I did fall to the ground! And I do have a bruise from it! And the Comcast dude was freaked out!

And then I cursed everyone in Georgetown for sucking, because everyone in Georgetown sucks.

EXCEPT JAVIER AT THE MAC STORE.

Because he helped me learn how to install a hard drive! He was all "No no, don't do it here, it'll cost you so much, let me write down everything you need to know and then go to Best Buy and get the stuff." So, I bought Snow Leopard for $30, and then went to Best Buy in Tenley and bought a 320 gig hard drive for $60, and ALSO 2 gigs of RAM for $80. Because of math, I spent $170, but if I hadn't done the RAM it would have been $90, which is awesomer than the $250 at the store, which only would have been a 160 gig hard drive and no RAM upgrade! And then I went home and did it myself, with a quick pause for a trip to ACE to buy a tiny Torx screwdriver. I was kind of freaked out and my hands were shaking but I did it with all the tiny screws and everything. Then I just reformatted and installed Snow Leopard and then I took an old copy of Microsoft Office 2004 from BB's family, and now MY COMPUTER IS AWESOME.

The one thing I am sad about as a result of doing it myself is that I was looking forward to the Mac store cleaning my computer, which they always do no matter what problem they are fixing. Now I have a dirty but fast computer, for cheap! So I am not really sad.

Also while I was at the bike shop I ordered toe clips, and then while I was at Best Buy I bought Serenity, Fever Pitch, and Whip It, and then while I was at the hardware store I bought that torx screwdriver and shower cleaner, so I did end up spending a bunch of money today, but it wasn't all in the direction I thought I would spend it when I woke up this morning!

Oh also I did all these things while wearing my Old 97s shirt, so I HAVE SO MUCH CRED LOOK GUYS AT ALL OF IT

ALSO IT IS ALMOST SHARK WEEK

SHAAAARK WEEEEEEK

Sea to shining sea each year

The other day I went on one of the most frustrating journeys of my life (biking to Georgetown at any time on a weekday is never worth doing again) to find out that I need a new hard drive in my laptop. So, that is a thing I'm doing tomorrow, so that I can trade $250 for 160 gigs.

Next to me on the counter is a shopping list that says:

Keg

Grill

Eli. parts

Roofer

order cleats

Partially because I need to pay for things like emergency hard drives all the time, partially because I've been freaking out about student loans (what do you mean my balance has gone from $13k to $16k?!), I am taking lots of extra hours of work. I skipped ballet tonight for the baby named Dave Jr. (he looks like a tiny version of my friend Dave). Tomorrow I skip enjoying the pleasant evening for the baby who shall be known only as BB. This sometimes stands for "Baby Beibz," because with his current hair situation he kind of looks like Justin Bieber, but mostly it stands for "Blorfy Baby," because his favorite pasttime is blorfing ALL OVER ME. All the time. Dave Jr. is a pretty pleasant baby, he's 18 months and the worst thing he does is refuse to sit down in the bath. BB is adorable and all that, but he's 9 months, weighs 28 pounds, has the aforementioned blorfing problem, and is really fussy, which is only exacerbated by the fact that his mom works from home and naturally comes every time he screams for longer than 30 seconds. It is fine! It is just hard work. what?! I have to work for my moneys?!?

Nothing is new and I am dying for something new!

And this is what we wanted, a place to settle down

It turns out that the bar next to the bike shop has an excellent happy hour, and if you sit outside and drink a gin & tonic while waiting to meet a high school friend for dinner, one of the bike shop dudes might recognize you and tell you that you should come to the shop for a beer.

Speaking of bike,


There you can see also my rad polkadotted helmet, and my new 24 oz. insulated water bottle that was on sale, and also my shiny new stem that makes me feel like I am sitting upright when I ride, even though if you look at my bike, you will see that I am still nowhere near upright, especially because I ride in the drops most of the time (better brake control with my tiny hands, necessary for city riding... you can see the dirty spot where my hand goes, yuck). Also, there is Sawyer. She has her eyes closed but she is modeling her fabulousness all the same.

Also, I love Natalie.

Happy Tuesday?

Some interesting use of second person in this post today!

Matt Lauer was shaking his head

Sometimes I forget how great Girlyman is, and then I smack myself in the head for wasting time listening to other, lesser music.

I am a border collie when it comes to listening to music. I listen to one artist / band over and over until I get sick of them, and then I go to another artist, and listen to that over and over, etc. This happens with Neko Case, the New Pornographers, Girlyman, Rhett Miller, the Old 97s, Michael Jackson, Glee, Chuckanut Drive, and sometimes Dar Williams too. (Side note, you should listen to all of these things, except Glee, omg Gleeeee it's so bad) Right now I'm taking a break from the NPs to have this song infiltrate my brain, or rather to listen to that song repeatedly and wonder how Girlyman infiltrated my brain. Also, that whole album.

OH ALSO one of the other ones that I cycle through is Lady Gaga. of course.

Anyway the point is I am not very good at mixing things up.

Um so yeah, this is an example of me trying to get any work done at all at the Eastern Market Starbucks and FAILING MISERABLY. it's so cold here and there is just so much free internet and so many amusing bougie white girls to watch and did you know that a dirty chai frap tastes just like gingerbread??

there is a girl here in a pink and white striped boatneck 3/4 length sleeved shirt, and also snakeskin gladiator sandals, and also high-waisted shorts that are navy blue with tan diamonds on them, and her pink shirt is tucked into her shorts, which is a thing I don't understand. It is maybe one of the weirdest fashion choices I have ever seen. Power to her for wearing sleeves in 8109283 degrees Celsius. Amusing white girls.

It is too hot to get work done at home, and everywhere else is too air-conditioned.

A roommate and I went on a bike ride yesterday and it was like 15 miles (or, at least, over 10, and I am rounding up because it was so hot) and I got a new stem on my bike, and it is so great and I never want to get off my bike but my butt hurts from riding and also I need a little bit of a break from being drenched in sweat.

Today is Stellina's birthday! She is two now. Later I will write about our trip to the bike shop last week, which was super fun and great.

THIS HAS BEEN A SUPER INFORMATIVE AND INTERESTING POST THANKS FOR READING GUYS

West Virginia to the north

People who are my sister will now be attacked by this image for a third time (first email, second Bookface), but it is too amazing to not share a lot:


Today was rainy, so Stellina and I couldn't go outside really, we have been having crazy crazy thunderstorms, so she attacked my bag, and put on my extra shirt (NatsTown) and socks (argyle), and then my shoes and bike helmet, and went through my wallet and dragged around my Timbuk2 a bit and generally impersonated me. The shirt is a unisex medium, so, huge on me, extra ginormous on her. The bottom of it dragged on the ground and the sleeves covered her hands all the way before I rolled them up a bit.

She turns 2 on Sunday. Already if you ask her how old she is, she says "Do! Do!" which seems to be the only number she knows. I got her a couple of books, one called Baby Giggles (the kid is absolutely obsessed with babies), and then Maisy Goes to Preschool (Stellina will be starting preschool in the fall, and I will miss her but I don't want her to be scared), and also Elmo's ABC Book (if you thought she loved babies, she loves Elmo even more, and also she will need to learn the alphabet soon).

Another really important thing that happened today was that I bought my plane ticket to go home for a bit in September. Now I need to make a comprehensive list of all the things I want to do in Portland and Seattle! It will come up very very quickly I know, and I am so excited but also I will be sad to be gone from here for so long. I will miss my cats and my bike and my kids and my city. Mid-September is a great time of year in DC.

I am having a problem with my bike. When I get on it I do not want to get off. I don't care where I go, I just want to ride around and look at stuff and get totally lost and just spend time going fast or going slow and swerving to avoid potholes and stopping at stop signs and running red lights (of course when it is safe to do so) and getting angry when people drive or park or walk in the bike lane, which I learned some things about today. I guess my bike continues to be an extended metaphor for my current place in life, though I don't think that metaphor is the correct literary device, please help.

The day before yesterday my roommate and I converted his bike to a single-speed after his rear derailleur broke to unfixable proportions (that is not a fixie pun, his bike is not a fixie), and then we decided to ride to Screen on the Green, which was much more fun than I expected it to be. Both the ride and the movie. Halfway through the sky opened up and it started to flood, complete with lightning right on top of us. Roommate was terrified of the lightning so he dropped his keys and phone and wallet in the middle of the ground and then just kind of ran in a circle and then just stood there looking sad and confused. Then we decided we probably weren't going to die and so we danced in the sheets of rain until it stopped and we were soaked all the way.

And so, we rode home on the wet streets, which were nearly empty in the dark, and we went up a huge long hill at the Capitol, and roommate's bike doesn't have gears, and I can't change gears yet because I have to have two hands on the handlebars or I will die (my shifters are on my frame, not handlebars), so we sang Livin' On A Prayer at the top of our lungs to get to the top of the hill. The Hill, I guess. The view of the Capitol as we rode east on Constitution was breathtaking, or maybe it was just that I had just ridden up a crazy crazy hill without being able to downshift.

Then when we got home we got fried chicken and mac & cheese and ate it sitting in the middle of the kitchen floor.

A Ginger in a Red Sox Onesie

I read a lot of Kate Beaton's comics yesterday from her Twitter, (also you should read Hark A Vagrant if you do not already go and read every single one right now it is worth all the hours) (this one is one of my most favorites ever) so then I remembered that I had wanted to do hourly comics so today I am doing hourlies and maybe I'll do them tomorrow too because even though my life is boring, picking out one thing every hour to put down makes me feel kind of important, in a boring and insignificant kind of way.

Then I remembered that I am bad at drawing and so a lot of my comics today are made only of words. except the really profound drawing of me waking up in the morning with crazy morning hair and crazy angry morning eyes.

I went to get my bike at the shop today, Future Bike Shop Husband called me last night and said that the wrong stem came from the supplier place (sidenote: I hope FBSH was right about the stem business, I forgot to tell him that even though I am 5'6" all my length is in my torso. Longtorso is loooong) and I should pick my bike up and then come back later when it will be in for real. So then I did, and then I rode my bike up 8th Street from Barracks Row to my house, and I learned a thing. The thing that I learned is to not ride on 8th Street.

Today is Captain Bananio's birthday. He is two! Happy birthday little guy.

EDIT: Kate Beaton just yelled at the people for calling their comics boring and sucky. MY HOURLIES ARE SUPER INTERESTING AND AWESOME GUYS.

Pulled by my name

When it is time to catch up with old friends, the things that we talk about start with "what are you doing now," and right after that comes "what are you doing next." It is never "what are some of the things that you have been doing in the 3 weeks / 6 months / 17 months / 4 years since I talked to you last." It is also never "if you could do it all again, would you."

It is also never "do I still matter to you like I did when we were growing up together."

A Few Things That Are True.

Prince Phillip is now five. As we were coloring yesterday and I was listening to him ramble on and on about something that only a five-year-old would think of, I asked him if he'd ever heard of Axe Cop.

Prince Phillip: Axe Cop? Who is Axe Cop?
Me: You don't know Axe Cop?
PP: Nooooo who is Axe Cop?
Me: *recounts first episode of Axe Cop*
PP: But that's made up, right? Axe Cop's not real.
Me: I don't know, what do you think?
PP: Dinosaurs died a long time ago, Axe Cop couldn't fight them with any kind of weapon. They died in a big snow.
Me: But Axe Cop can fight anyone who is a bad guy.
PP: Only police can fight bad guys.
Me: Axe Cop is police. That's what "cop" means, it's another word for police. And police are good guys, right? They fight bad guys. And Axe Cop is the best at fighting bad guys, he fights them all the time and he never sleeps.
PP: Yeah. but Axe Cop isn't real.

I am guessing I will not be getting the plot for a guest Axe Cop strip out of this five-year-old.

this site just told me that DC is 95 degrees Celsius, or 203 degrees Fahrenheit. Also tells me that DC is like Yavin 4, which I am not sure I agree with, because it is not really that humid. It is totally 203 degrees though.

I don't update as often as I'd like anymore, partially due to the increasing amount of uninteresting things that happen to me. Every time I want to write an update, I can never think of anything really worth sharing.

I could write about fighting with Captain Bananio both yesterday and today about how even though he is almost two (!!!?! when did he get so big), he still needs to nap in the afternoon, and it is less than ideal to wait for a complete and utter meltdown at 5pm so that he can then fall asleep on my shoulder as soon as I pick up the boneless screaming blob from the floor.

I could write about begging Prince Phillip to watch Sleeping Beauty so that I could try to get CB to sleep, and reminding him that this time last year it was his favorite movie in the world. He was utterly uninterested and wanted to watch Diego Saves Christmas, but really he just wanted to cut up his Highlights Magazine with scissors. He also wanted to spell my name over and over on the Magnadoodle which we both thought was pretty great. He has learned a lot of stuff at school. SCHOOL!

I could write about the little girl that approached as I was clipping CB into his stroller today to go get PP at "camp" (it's really summer school, but shhh). She immediately asked, "What are you doing?"
To which I replied, "What are you doing?"
"No what are YOU doing?"
"Well, what are you doing?"
"Nooo, what are YOU doing?"
"I don't know, what does it look like I'm doing?"
"Clipping him into his stroller and putting his hat on." At this point her lady caretaker/mama caught up and said to me, "Wow, you know how to answer that question!"

Yes. I work with kids.

And holy mayonnaise, do they grow up quickly.

A post just for Maeg

I rode my bike today. I went to work and I went to the bike shop and I went home.

Also I did not die but I broke lots of traffic laws I am sure.

I would like Tommy Wells to work on fixing the roads, especially right around Lincoln Park. Thanks for our overhead wires, though, Tommy!

Any more than I needed her too?

It is time for partyz.


Someday my roommate will find out that I put a picture of him wearing an apron with no shirt on the internet, and he will make me take it down.

Until that day, please feast your eyes on this piece of wonder. By that I mean the goat ribs on the grill.

Leave it there for safekeeping

Certainly one of the greatest nights of my life.

(my new bride)

Themselves in Rockband / Guitar Hero? version. They made jokes about how AC Newman was only 85% of ... himself. On the song that he wrote.

(The New Pornographers at DC's 9:30 Club - June 23, 2010)

Things For Which I Am Eternally Grateful, episode II

Kisses from babies.

Free stuff at baseball games.

Popsicles in summer (not serial killers, though).

Beautiful women.

The flea market at approximately New York Ave, NE and Florida Ave, NE, and also the wholesalers around there.

Fresh mangoes. $7 a box!

My ticket to the New Pornographers show! which is 27 hours in the future from now!

Kisses from babies. Back me up on this one, they're just that fantastic.

Things To Which I Am Morally Opposed, episode IV

The neighbors having a disgusting pond of water in their front yard, which really is just a massive breeding ground for mosquitoes

Things that make my feminist brain hurt

People who care about Elena Kagan's sexuality, or anyone's for that matter

Busting a hole in my ballet slippers 7 minutes before the end of class, placing me in the inconvenient situation of having to dance on Thursday with a giant hole in my shoe before my new ones arrive in the mail

This, which I absolutely know I signed up for:

The Letter C

I finally figured out how to keep score at yesterday's Nats-White Sox game... Except not until halfway through the fifth inning, so there's a scorecard that doesn't make any sense for half the game. I moved around a bunch and decided Section 416 is where to be when I'm alone and want to keep score. At least 'til I move down to the 100s in the 7th inning.
Demonstration:


I feel like such a nerd going to the games alone, mostly because I laugh out loud at some songs that the organist plays. Yesterday I texted him and asked him to play Hey, Soul Sister (my favorite guilty pleasure song, as has been previously demonstrated), and he was all "Oh man I don't know if I can fit it in today, I'm trying to play songs that fit with Father's Day! but I'll try to squeeze it in" but then, there in the middle of the 8th inning, at double speed, were the tiny electric notes of Train! And then I laughed, and looked at the audio/visual box grinning, and everyone thought I was insane.

In other news, I have unmistakable tan lines on my feet from the sandals that I've been wearing every single day, which is pretty crazy, because I have never been tan in my life. I also still have tan lines from this time, in which I am wearing convertible tights from ballet class that stop mid-calf. I burned slightly from that mark down, though the rest of me was not burned, thankfully, because burns are bad. Instead of just going back to white like normal, it turned into tan, which now looks like a reverse sock tan on my legs. With sandal marks on my feet.

Here is a present for Solstice: the blog of my friend James! Read it, it's real real good, and also funny, and I'm not just saying that because it's my friend writing it. Especially read this page.

fireflies and cherry pies

I no longer have any sort of reasoning behind titles of blog posts.

Last night I ate a mango right before bed while watching Thursday's Daily Show, and now my computer has sticky yellow goo on it. Mmm mango goo.

Now, I am eating a mini cherry pie from Dangerously Delicious Pies, and on the hexagonal bar / coffee table next to me - don't worry, it's on a coaster - is a pint of chocolate milk from Clear Spring Creamery, which also provided me with the quarter pound of quark that is waiting in the fridge. My farmer's market is small but tasty!

Bad Decisions Dinosaur

That fried chicken sandwich after my first ballet class in 3 months may not have been really smart.

Looking at wedding photos while already in a weird alone-mood also may not have been that great an idea, either.

Letting Stellina walk to Eastern Market pushing her bebe strubber! bebe strubber! (baby doll in the toy stroller) in 85 degree weather - maybe should have thought twice about that one.

Choosing to work Saturday night - leaving me with no free nights this weekend! - instead of going to the Nats-White Sox game which will be broadcast nationally on Fox, I might end up wishing I had made a different choice.

Making another blog post that is yet another list, yeah, I really shouldn't have done that.

Awesome Shit that I Have Already Done in DC

1) Sunrise Easter service at Arlington Cemetery

2) Midnight Mass at the National Cathedral on Christmas

3) Easter mass at the National Cathedral

4) Various Smithsonians - Air & Space, American History, Natural History, American Indian, Castle, American Art

5) Inauguration of President Obama

6) Inaugural Concert!

7) Inaugural Ball! Western States reppppresent

8) White House tour

9) Nats games at both RFK and Nats Park

10) Pride Festival (though not the parade, boo)

11) Cherry Blossom Festival

12) Flown into and out of all three airports (lame, I know, but it's a thing)

13) Lunch at the Senate cafeteria

14) Experienced a summer thunderstorm on top of a house in Columbia Heights

15) Tended bar at a DCWeek event

16) had days where I go to all four quadrants

17) eaten at Ben's Chili Bowl

18) mini-golf at H Street Country Club

Ok! some are boring. but there are some things that I think are cool because they can only be done in this city. SUCK IT, OTHER, LESSER CITIES.

there's lots of other stuff I can't remember right now

It's List Wednesday!

I am bored, and don't want to work on things that I need to work on, so I decided to finally put down my DC Bucket List - stuff that I haven't done yet in DC and really need to do before I move away. I don't know when that is, but it is at minimum a year, so just to be safe, I want to start making sure I can take care of business and do everything.

So here is my list of shit that I haven't done yet in DC but want to do / places I haven't been but need to, in no particular order.

PLACES:

1) Roosevelt Island

2) National Arboretum

3) Hirschhorn Gallery

4) FDR Memorial

5) Air & Space Museum at Dulles

6) Frederick Douglass House

7) Pentagon Memorial

8) the museum in Katzen at AU

THINGS TO DO:

1) Sunrise at the Lincoln Memorial

2) Caps game

3) DC United game

4) Watch the drag race in Dupont

5) Screen on the Green

6) Roller derby (uh... watch, not participate, as much as I love Whip It)

7) train to Baltimore for the day (I know that's not DC, but, it starts at Union Station!)

8) a sport on the Mall! frisbee, bocce, softball, croquet, etc. doesn't matter which one.

9) go up the Washington Monument

10) Embassy open houses, EU and others

11) Paddle boats in the Tidal Basin (except this is so romantic I might barf)

What am I missing? It doesn't need to be all national shit, it can be like "hey you totally need to go to Sticky Rice on H Street, NE! and have omakase, and a carafe of sake. Then, go to the Biergarten Haus and drink whiskey while rooting for the Celtics, as your roommate shuns you in his ugly-ass Laker hat."

Well, I did that last night, so, think of something else.

OK well we also have a list of Awesome Shit that I Have Already Done in DC, which will be the next post, for ease of editing.

How 'bout them Uruguayans?